


baths, beans and bed-head

by Siriusstuff



Series: Teodor Claudius Talan Stilinski-Hale [9]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Fluff, Kid Fic, M/M, Married Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski, Parenthood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-08
Updated: 2015-09-08
Packaged: 2018-04-19 17:34:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4755083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Siriusstuff/pseuds/Siriusstuff
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bath night in the Stilinski-Hale household unleashes Stile's hair-stylist aspirations, with some unanticipated anatomical discussion.</p>
            </blockquote>





	baths, beans and bed-head

Around the time he turned a year old, bath time for Teo became bath time _with_ Teo. The little guy loved being in the water, splashing in it gleefully and with all his energy.

Only a heartless fiend could get angry about it.

As Teo’s command of his limbs got better and better the water splashed farther and farther.

Bathing him in the kitchen sink meant mopping the floor afterwards. Getting him his own baby tub resulted in everything around the tub getting wet.

Stiles was a patient papa. He accepted that wearing shorts and an old t-shirt was necessary when giving his kid a bath. But he also suggested putting him in the back yard and hosing him down.

Derek’s patience was much more durable. His solution was to just fill their bathtub and get in with the boy.

Stiles joined them on rare occasions, but only if it was a _bubble_ bath.

Teo was fine with _all_ of it.

"Boppa!" he exclaimed when Stiles entered the bathroom, bath time already in progress.

He offered Stiles Tutty, his squeaky turtle toy.

On his knees at tub side Stiles took the turtle, squeaked it few times then dropped it back in the tub once Teo moved on to fascination with his duckie-shaped sponge.

"Are we anywhere near finished?" Stiles asked Derek.

Derek probably enjoyed bath time with Teo as much as Teo did.

"Well," he began, and he did _not_ sound sheepish at all, "we were still in the having fun part."

"Howf!" Teo added. "Boppa, bat!"

"Sorry, Aquaman, Papa’s not taking a bath with you tonight.—Where’s the wash cloth?"

Teo looked around, handing Stiles the turtle again.

Derek retrieved the cloth from somewhere beside him.

Since Stiles had known him Derek preferred (read: insisted on) an unscented soap. Usually it was a quality baking soda and aloe based soap, which was good for the skin and left his pack with their natural scents.

After lathering up the cloth Stiles washed Teo’s neck, shoulders, chest, arms. Derek had soaped his hands and washed the toddler’s back, then he lifted Teo out of the water so Stiles could clean him down to his toes.

"Who’s gonna smell so sweet?" Stiles sang.

"Me!" Teo peeped.

"Yes, you!—Wanna wash his hair?" he asked Derek.

They’d bought a hose attachment that ended in a spray nozzle, for the faucet. While Stiles adjusted the water temp Derek shampooed Teo’s hair.

Really, tag-team bathing the boy had proved the most effective means of getting him washed, as long as he was allowed ample play time.

His love of water included his not minding water in his face. Derek shielded Teo’s eyes while Stiles sprayed the lather from his hair and rinsed off his little body, without any protest.

 _That_ arose when washing his face, which, for still unknown reasons, Teo did not like.

"No! _No!"_ Even against the gentlest wipes Teo turned his head this way and that.

"Look, Tay. Look." Stiles pretended to wash his own face, then pretended to wash Derek’s.

"Now, Teo’s turn."

" _No_."

Not until Derek blew raspberries against the back of his neck was Teo sufficiently distracted for a hurried face wash.

"Why is _that_ an ordeal?" Stiles wondered.

"Let him have the washcloth," Derek suggested, then said to Teo, "Wash Daddy’s face, Tay."

Holding only a corner of the cloth Teo swished it back and forth over Derek’s mouth, part of a cheek, then he was done and let the cloth drop.

"Think that accomplished anything?" Stiles asked.

"I don’t know. Next time let him wash your face first; see what happens."

"OK, squirt, wanna get out and get your pj’s on?"

" _No_."

"Feel like I’ve got a trend going here," Stiles sighed. But Derek lifted Teo from the tub and set him outside it on the bath mat, where Stiles waited with a fluffy towel, wrapping up the boy and scurrying away with him before he could make a move.

Derek listened as Stiles accompanied Teo’s transportation to their bedroom with fart sounds, Teo giggling all the way.

Derek decided to wash away the bath water he’d been sitting in for the past half hour.

Stiles heard the shower start as he laid his bundle of baby on the bed and started drying Teo’s flailing arms and legs, making a game of it.

Teo had inherited his daddy’s dark hair and only now, between his first and second years, was it really growing in, promising to be thick and wavy—and potentially a wild tangle if not kept tamed. Stiles had bought a wide-toothed comb and was starting to feel like a stylist, so adept was he at combing out his little boy’s damp locks.

After removing the towel from Teo’s head Stiles saw the sprouting mane pointing in every direction.

"Hey, little wild man, here," he handed Teo a brush to occupy him while he did the comb-out.

When he had Teo’s hair combed smooth, Stiles decided to part it in the middle. The boy’s raven hair and prominent eyebrows (from his Daddy, again) often brought adoring comments and coos from strangers—at least those who managed to get near enough when Derek allowed them, but other than shampoo faux-hawks this was the first time Teo’s hair had anything like a styling.

Stiles reached for his phone to get some head shots of his stylish baby boy.

" _What_ are you doing?" came Derek’s voice from the doorway.

Stiles didn’t even turn toward his towel-clad husband.

"Quiet, you.—He looks like a movie star."

"Yeah—from the 90’s," Derek quipped.

"I think it’s adorable!’

Teo let go the brush once he saw the phone, a much more desirable thing to hold. But Stiles wasn’t going to give it to him. It wasn’t slobber-proof.

"I think we should try it out. See what people think."

Derek played his trump card instantly: "See what _Lydia_ thinks."

"Ah, Big Bad, you underestimate Lydia’s appreciation for things retro."

While Stiles selected the best photo to send Lydia Derek considered Teo’s curtain-style hair. It _was_ adorable. But Teo could work Einstein hair; he’d still be adorable. Teo was _genetically_ adorable.

"Um, _honey_ ," Derek sing-songed, with as much smarm as he could muster.

Stiles, finished sending the photo to Lydia, his dad, and for good measure to Talia too, glanced up at Derek a little blankly.

Derek, closer to the bed now, gestured with his chin towards their son.

Teo, having nothing else to hold had reached for his most recent discovery, conveniently attached to himself, and was quietly gripping it, placidly looking up at his dads.

Stiles chuffed. "Whatcha got there, baby boy?"

Teo said nothing till Stiles asked him again, pointing at his handful. "What is that?"

"M’bean," Teo answered.

"Your ‘bean,’" Stiles echoed. " _We_ haven’t gotten to naming that part of his anatomy yet," he pointed out to Derek. "Have you?"

Derek nodded.

"What’d you tell him to call it?" Stiles asked.

"His _penis_ ," Derek replied, the _of course_ unspoken but heavily implied.

" _Penis_ ," Stiles echoed once more.

"Beants," Teo confirmed.

" _Oh_ ," Stiles crooned, "Anatomical accuracy it is, then."

"Would you rather he call it his _wee-wee_ or his _willy_?"

Stiles could barely contain his giggles. "If it meant you saying ‘wee wee’ and ‘willy’ again, _yes_!"

Derek shook his head.

"Well," he huffed, "what did _you_ call your di—your _penis_ when you were his age?"

"I don’t remember being his age," Stiles answered. "But I do remember calling it my peanut—when I was really young."

Then it was Derek’s turn to stifle a laugh—only he didn’t stifle it, instead stepping to their dresser for a pair of briefs. He unfurled the towel from his waist, so that Stiles got an eyeful of his husband’s fine ass.

"’Peanut,’" Derek chuckled still, low enough to suggest he didn’t want to be heard yet not actually low enough to be _un_ heard.

"Yes!" Stiles protested. "And I’ll remind you of this next time this _peanut’s_ got your eyes rolling back in your head!"

Back at the bed to scoop up Teo for diapering and readying for sleep, Derek kissed Stiles’s forehead as he leaned down.

"You’re assuming I was laughing at you," Derek said very calmly, "when maybe it was the irony I find funny."

"Irony? What irony?"

"Turned out to be a _jumbo_ peanut, didn’t it?" He grinned a cheesy grin.

Stiles only snorted. "Good save, Hale," he smirked. But two texts had come in and Stiles’s phone had been alerting throughout the whole peanut debacle.

The first was from Talia, burbling about how adorable her grandson looked with parted hair.

The second, from the Sheriff, referenced one of the Three Stooges, which Stiles was going to have to Google.

Lydia’s reply did not come till Teo was already in his crib, Derek tenderly stroking his chest with his fingertips.

Very quietly Stiles read aloud Lydia’s message: "She says it’s cute but also looks like something Teo will hate us for showing other people in ten to twelve years."

Derek scowled.

"Shh, Mr. Sensitive," Stiles whispered. He reached into the crib, lifting Derek’s hand from Teo’s chest and setting it in his scalp, where Derek resumed his stroking, even more tenderly, but effectively removing whatever remained of the part in the boy’s hair.

"Bed head’s best," Stiles declared, barely audibly.

When Teo’s steady heartbeat assured Derek he was asleep, they left the little bedroom. On the way down the stairs Derek asked Stiles, "That thing about my eyes rolling back in my head—think you could manage that—on the couch?"

After a kiss, still keeping his voice down, Stiles announced, "One jumbo peanut, coming up!"


End file.
